You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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