strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Can I color on your dick again?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
