dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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