"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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