Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Randomize
