There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
