she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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