it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
