I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize