I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
