Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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