it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
