found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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