considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize
