Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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