Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
