ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
