Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize