My nipple is on Facebook.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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