she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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