Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize