he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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