Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
You are a genius and a whore.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
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