omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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