Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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