is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
