More tranny stories later!
I think I died a long time ago.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize