Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
