People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.