4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.