These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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