Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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