one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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