I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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