when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
