He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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