halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
The chlamydia really affected his face.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
