I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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