do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Will exercising make me less horny?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
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