i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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