they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize