I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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