seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
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