Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize