I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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