cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
