u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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