I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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