Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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