Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
There's always time for handjobs
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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