i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
