What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
