Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
