Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
