Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
